Upside Down, Inside Out, Round and Round

Wow- what a roller coaster these past couple of months have been. Long story short- the girls are back at their old little private school here and we have taken our house off of the market for the time being. So much confusion..... The girls' new school ended up being a total nightmare. It was twice as much as the little school they went to here, the curriculum was not nearly as challenging and there was one little girl in each of their classes who just ruined the whole experience for them both. E had a girl in her class who would go home and look at internet porn, and then come back and describe everything she saw to the other girls in class (these are 8 year old girls!!). Every week, this same little girl would do or say something that would just absolutely blow my mind because 8 year old girls should not be doing or saying the things this little girl was. Then in A's class, a girl was teaching all the other girls all of the curse words, including the F-bomb, and she was also teaching the girls how to say the words in Greek so the teachers wouldn't know they were cursing. I am disgusted at the fact that not only have my girls gotten 'educated' on all of these things at a so-called private Christian school, but that we paid for them to be in that environment! We've been so careful to protect them from this stuff for so many years, and in the two months they were there, I feel like so much of what we've done was unraveled. We never had any incidents even close to those at the little school they're at here. So- we've taken the house off of the market for now and put them back into the school here- and everyone's much happier now- including the girls. I can't undo what was done at that school- I can't make them un-hear and un-see what they saw and heard. But I am so thankful that they feel comfortable enough with me to have told me about all of it- and that they did not participate in any of it themselves. They aren't perfect by any stretch of the imagination, but they're good girls. I still really want to move back to the Eastside- because everything we do is over there (well, except for school- but this school here would only be about 20 mins from where we'd live out there- and they'll only be at this school for a few more years...) We just don't know what to do. So- since we know that God is not the author of confusion- we've decided that we are just going to sit back and let Him work this out any way He sees fit. For the first time ever, we're fully trusting that He will intervene however He wants, and that means that we don't do anything but pray and wait. Not wait with anxiety, but wait with hope and excitement to see what His will is going to be. If He wants us to stay here and continue to drive 30 minutes to all of our activities and such- then that is what we will do and we will be happy to do it. But, if He wants us to move back to the Eastside, then He will send a buyer for this house at the right time and He is perfectly able to do that with or without a real estate agent or a sign in the yard. I sometimes have to remind myself that God does not need our help or our advice. And so, I am happy and I am content for the first time in a long time. I so desperately want to be 'settled'- to know that I am 'home' (as 'home' as I can be on this Earth, anyway)- but I am going to excitedly and expectantly await for God to show us what He wants for us, and that feels good. Everything else is going so well. I have recently finished a very challenging course- the 7th out of 10 in this Master's Degree program I'm in. I'm taking a break from school until after the holidays so I can enjoy them and so I can spend time with the girls. I have all of my Christmas shopping done, and all of the decorations are up and they look so beautiful. I am so truly blessed and I am so grateful to have the life that I have. It feels good to have peace inside. May each of you who reads this know the love and peace of the God who cares so deeply for you this Christmas season.